Keeping your Sanity in the Midst of Chaos

Keeping your Sanity in the Midst of Chaos

I love the summer. I love the warm, sunny weather and I love the laziness of no school schedules. When my boys started back to school a few weeks ago, part of me became sad and anxious. I started thinking about what that meant – the school schedules, sports, activities, homework, carpool, early mornings, packing lunches, the need for organization, and the list goes on. My peaceful summer mornings were gone and replaced with drill sergeant reminders of eating breakfast quickly and rushing out the door to get to school on time.

Even though the thought of all of these things can make me feel anxious, there are so many things about them that I enjoy. However, I am learning that if I’m not careful, the crazy schedule can overtake me and change my mood. So what am I going to do about it?

Boundaries.

I have found that setting boundaries for myself and sticking to them save my sanity. So even though the schedule can be crazy at times, if I’ve set my boundaries in advance and stick to them, the schedule doesn’t seem so intense.

Here are the boundaries I’ve found that are important to me:

1)      My health.

Physically – I need/want to work out 4 times a week for my health and stress release.

Mentally/Emotionally – I need to get 7-8 hours of sleep every night.

Spiritually – I need quiet time every morning before the kids wake up.

These are items that I’ve found are important for me to function at my best.

2)      My schedule.

I am a planner. I like/need to know the weekly schedule by Sunday evening so I can prepare myself and everyone else accordingly. I realize that flexibility is a must, especially with kids and multiple schedules, but it is good for me to have the main jist of the weekly schedule on my planner by Sunday.

3)      Lunches.

Packing lunches at night save me SO MUCH TIME in the mornings! I’m learning that this is a must for me!

4)      Technology.

My busiest time in a day is from about 4:30-8pm. Trying to make dinner, help with homework, run kids to practices, etc. all happen during this time. Also, it’s the only time during the school week that I get to spend quality time with my kids. I am starting to put my phone in my room during these hours. This allows me to not be distracted with calls, texts, or social media. I can focus on my kids and family time.

5)      Bedtimes.

When we push bedtimes later and later during the school year, the result is never positive. I’m finding that keeping bedtime consistent is still important, even when they are getting older.

All three of our boys share a room. Luke, our oldest, doesn’t need as much sleep as Jonah, who is in Kindergarten. However, since they share a room, it’s hard to give different bedtimes. I have found that if I put them in bed at the time but allow Luke to read with his flashlight (which he loves), Jonah will go to sleep and Luke gets an extra 30 minutes of awake time. This has been successful for us!

Getting the kids to bed on time also allows me to finish up any last minute work I need to complete and gives me the down time I want before I need to get to bed.

6)      Weekends.

I want my weekends to be filled with items I want to do, not things I have to do. So, I try to do all grocery shopping and house cleaning during the week so I can actually enjoy the weekend. I would rather clean house on a Thursday evening than have to spend my Saturday doing it.  I like to make sure that I have times of rest/do nothing moments during my weekend as well so I can feel recharged by Monday.

I read an article that suggested dividing your weekend into 7 parts – Friday evening, Saturday morning/afternoon/evening, and Sunday morning/afternoon/evening. Make sure that at least two parts of your weekend involve resting and relaxing.

7)      Spend time serving others.

Our schedules can consume our thoughts but don’t forget to give back. Start serving at your church. You are wanted and needed! Volunteer at a school or a hospital. Taking the focus off of our schedules and investing time in others is a great way to be refreshed as well. Don’t get caught in the “I’m too busy” trap.

“One who refreshes others will he himself be refreshed, too.”

8)      Re-evaluate the schedule.

If I ever feel like my schedule is just getting out of control, I’m learning that it’s important to re-evaluate the schedule. If I rate the items on my schedule in order of importance, it can help me focus on what really needs to be on the schedule and what can be left off for another time.

9)      Invest in relationships.

I’m usually more of an extroverted person and love friendships. However, quality time isn’t one of my love languages so I haven’t been as good as I want to be at spending time with friends. As I look into this new school year, I’m challenging myself to be better at being more intentional. More coffee dates and lunch meetings. I don’t want to do life alone. We also designate at least one day a week to just our family. 😊

 

Boundaries are important for me to function at my best. They help guard, guide, and protect. There have been several seasons in my life where I didn’t have boundaries and it lead me into times of depression. I listened to a great podcast today and wanted to share just in case you are walking through a non-boundary phase that is causing some depression (faulty thinking) : Depression

 

What boundaries do you make for yourself?